Terry, a 56-year-old female went to law school late in life after raising 3 children and working as a full-time nurse for several years. She prided herself in being able to get the job done, was tough, determined, had a high grade point average, didn't take "no" for an answer and had a motto that said "if a little bit is good, a little bit more is probably better." She thought of herself as a "bulldozer." The problem: she came to us with the difficulty of not being able to complete the application to take the BAR, even though her statistical likelihood of passing it (she was graduating in the top 20% of her class at her "pretty good" law school.) Terry's law school was small, with a total of 200 students for all three years. Terry attended full-time and said she enjoyed the connection with her professors, the small class size, and the computer resources that were available to them. She had learned to maximize her time by working online from her notebook computer at either her home or while parked in her car in one of her favorite getaways. When we asked Terry why she thought she might not be able to complete the application, she was genuinely mystified and said that she'd never thought about seeing a shrink before, even one that works with law students. She also took 10 minutes to answer the question and wouldn't hear of me interrupting her. Terry demanded control over her response to the question. She was on a "mission" to tell explain this to us and it seemed, come hell or high water, she would get the information out. We asked her if she knew where the test would be given. Not surprisingly she did. We asked her if she'd been there. She said no. ACLShough the BAR committee had used this conference center regularly, she wasn't particularly interested in sports or conferences enough for a visit, much less any other matter that wasn't involved in controlling her own life and studying things her own way. We asked her if she could even imagine going to visit the conference center and taking the test there, and what feeling she might have if she did imagine herself doing that. Again, a waterfall of reasons why that was a ridiculous exercise and she could think of better things to do, etc. After a while, she finally admitted it was too difficult for her to "imagine herself" being "that exposed" and taking the test. She didn't know what these feelings meant. But the fact that she was close to nauseous from her own anxiety indicated to both of us that we were getting close to the reason why she couldn't apply for the test. The short answer: Terry was agoraphobic. That is, she was afraid of fear or losing control. Her anxiety had long been compensated for with a good deal of control, self-determination, and obsessiveness. Terry threw herself into tasks and moved into areas where she felt she could manage: small classes, etc. The vulnerability of being in an open space of the conference center amongst the "many hundreds" that would be taking the test were so crippling in its anxiety that she would have to sabotage, unknowingly, her taking the test. The formula of "if I can't take it, I can't fail," combined with "if I don't take it, I'll never pass" was an unfortunate "strangling loop." Terry had contributed to it, and now it was overwhelming her. Terry's problem lay with difficulties in her emotional domain, and we sought to help her manage it. The treatment for agoraphobia was individualized for her. She successfully applied to the BAR. She gradually learned how to approach the building, sit in it and finally studied in it to give herself the leg up she needed to break out of her cycle. Terry took the exam and passed. She's happy, though she still hates the BAR and that "damn" testing environment. Many individuals who are anxious don't have a clear understanding about how anxious they are and how it affects their performance. The procrastination and avoidance cycle is an identifiable syndrome and one that we have spent a good deal of time evaluating and treating. Granted, everybody gets anxious with the BAR, or anything else that gives the message, "take a number of days to write the best you can, and if it's no good you'll have to do it all again later." Terry was so anxious that even getting in touch with her anxiety was too pain-provoking for her. Many individuals would do well if they learned to manage their anxiety, not with avoidance or medication, but through learning to control that which can be controlled to take charge of their lives, as well as their illness.