ClanUK News |
 |
Unscheduled Web Move!
I won't go into the gory political details here, but on Tuesday night we lost the ClanUK web services and had to move pretty quickly to establish an alternative. As you all now know www.clanuk.org is our new home, for the time being at least. There are still areas of the site not completely functional (Forums) and all .com email addresses have changed. Sorry for not answering your queries individually, but as you can imagine I've got my plate full trying to pull everything together.
In the meantime, can Baltir and all ZoneMasters/GameAuthors contact me urgently, my new email address is webmaster@clanuk.org
Normal service will be resumed as soon as possible >;-)
Hammy [Webmaster]
The Blue Review
Wow, a real "weekly update", I must be keen. Actually, it's raining hard outside and I'm bored. So don't feel like I care or anything. In fact, I'm pretty annoyed because I found a shop around the corner that sells both Reeses pieces and Jolt Cola, I went down there today when the sun was shining and it started raining on the way. Ah well, I digress. Sit back, take a deep breath, choke on the fumes & stagger, teary-eyed through this week's happenings in ClanUK from my biased perspective.
CDMS
The master of all things Delphi, prince of the illusive and general all-around sound bloke known to those not sugar-crazed as Baltir has returned from what can only be described as a hectic real life to grace us with the presence of the CDMS once more. Opinions have been requested on both the Helpdesk and Clanchat forums, if you've got something to suggest get those fingers a-tappin'! It seems like there is still loads of enthusiasm for the project both from Baltir himself and the members of ClanUK who have been commenting so far. With any luck the CDMS will take off this time - finally the ridiculous amount of person power (ooh, politically correct ;)) that is being used to keep member administration in check will be cut and we can all get back to playing games whilst people sort their own stuff out. If you have any questions on the CDMS; what it is, what advantages it'll have etc. then there's information on the Helpdesk & ClanChat already, but feel free to add your own! questions/idiotic insight ;)
Asheron's Call Beta
Mixed reviews about this one on the forums. Is it a better version of EverQuest or just beastly product from the realms of evil that are the Microsoft production offices. I'd tell you to get out there & test it for yourself (Is it a crap less in-depth version of EQ and UO. Does it kick both of them soundly in the nuts? Or is it a completely different game?) but apparently Beta finishes this weekend.
Diablo2
The Pages In traditional ClanUK style preparation for a yet-to-be-released game has started in earnest. Child-prodigy and master of the English language; Th|=(aster is following up his successful re-vamp of the Strategy Zone with some fancy HTML in the new Diablo2 zone which is well worth a visit. If you intend to play Diablo2 (if/when it gets released) within ClanUK you'd better wander along to the zone and sign up. It looks like you get to make a profile for yourself too, just like the forums - What an opportunity to talk vast amounts of cack about yourself, go for it! Oh, there's also a compo, stupid answers to the question are called for, go and do me proud! The Forums The fun doesn't stop there though, the young scamp has teamed up with our furry webhamster to re-organise the RPG forums to allow a seperate area for Diablo2 stuff. This should prove very useful for communication once the game is released, so far discussion and trade are the Chat options available, I'm sure more will follow after release if they are needed ;) If you want to join the fun, run along to the RPG chat forum and post your Diablo2 related news or questions. If you want to laugh at the over-excited rabble run along to the RPG chat forum and read. If you want to laugh at the people laughing at.. etc.. well, you're almost as odd as me. Go find a doctor. The Debate Run over to the ClanUK Topics for Debate Forum and join the Diablo2 discussions. Remember to take along your happy pills and engage brain before responding to comments. Preferably your own. (brain, not comments) We can do spam & flame free discussions y'know, they smell more pleasant too.
Action speaks louder than words
The match between ClanUK and iD should be happening tommorrow as I write this, but today as you read it. Sunday at 3pm, as I've said repeatedly, iD are very very good. Still, lots of tactical discussions have been going on behind our closed doors and our warriors are prepared for battle, so it should be a good match. The Action zone is still rocking along quite nicely with high levels of enthusiasm. It looks like 3 people were all scrambling to get the news of a new UT version release onto the forums. Eager souls, bless 'em. ;) Lots of "keep up the good work" messages from me to the guys running the zone and the website bods, the UT zone looks wonderful, only wish I thought the same about the game :P. Interested in action games? Join the tactical discussions on our private tactics forum or go to the main Action Chat board & see if you can set up a game. The ActionUK mailing list is also available, just ask one of the main bods, Ypnos, Sephiroth & Hoolio, and they're sure to help you out. Afterall, they're just loveable, cuddly souls with guns.
It's not the size of your zone, but what you do with it.
Following the "Settlers 3 isn't dead!" rant last week the Strategy zone has seen more life than usual in the past week, proving that, although strategy isn't ClanUK's main department, if you want a game, there will be some poor soul in ClanUK ready and willing to show you just how pants you are. Whatever your poison, wander off to the Strategy forum and see if you can get a game. If not, convert people to your wonderful game. I'm sure they'll love you for making them addicted to another game.
No MMG News
Come on, you think if I played UO or EQ I could be arsed to write this? It's not like you lot have enough time to read and kill pks. Go back to your macroing and hate me forever. :P Although, of course, once I have this sodding Uni connect working I'll be able to play these things, but I'd like to pass my first year thanks. :P Clan Chat Compos Go on you cheapskates, visit ClanChat and see if you can win something with competitions that either require no skill or require you to be the brain of Britain, or the world or whatever planet some of you are from. On those rather rubbish attempts at controversy I shall leave you for another week and go drinking.
Comments? Suggestions? Rants? Thought not, still, I welcome mail at friedsmurf@hotmail.com - Thanks. Your iron & stone +=30ft-Smurf=+
The Blue Review
(The views within this column are merely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of ClanUK as a whole.)
Welcome to my slightly off-the-wall take on this weeks events within the lovely, cuddly & padded walled institution we call ClanUK. So, where to start? The middle seems somewhat apt but, for the sake of my sanity, I'll start where I would have finished were this not the first of my columns of verbal chunder. For the hard of reasoning, we'll call that "The beginning".
The New Kids on the Block
Unless you've been under a rock for the past couple of weeks you should be aware that the ClanUK Ops elections have taken place. My reference to the band that spawned a thousand bands, disbanded & then let loose the ghastly Jordan Knight on the world as a solo artist will, hopefully, not be an apt one as time passes. Indeed, our six slaves seem to have hit the ground running, a couple looking to break the sound barrier, impressive stuff indeed! The times they are a'changin', to coin even more abysmal cliches, and our furry ball of fury has already started adding to the smooth black hunk that is the ClanUK website, making it smoother, slightly redder and vaguely more approchable about emotional problems or teenage angst. The Ops are welcoming suggestions (of the concise nonsense-free variety) on the forums and via e-mail. So crack those whips & get busy! As for Hammy, well, just complain on the forums - he always sorts things out and seems quite used to getting hassled fr! om all sides. They say pain lies on the riverside (well, Live do) but our furry friend seems to have a level of tolerance to abuse similar to the levels shown to alcohol by that fat, bearded "I'd make satan wet himself" bloke in your local. Oh, and the former smiles a bit more too.
No Lights, Thankfully no Camera, Just Action a-plenty
The ugly beast of progressive thinking that is the Action Zone admin team is doing us proud once more. It seems the organisation is becoming lethal once more following the rather dramatic exit from a league no-one knew we were in & equally dramatic return to the league, supported by frantic ActionUK mailings & fast-paced tactical debates on the forums. Looking to capitalise on the increased enthusiasm for action games within ClanUK regular practices are being scheduled & no doubt the world will fall before us, doubled up in laughter? Maybe, but not according to the recent screenshot-frenzy proving our boys have what it takes to, um, kill stuff. John Romero himself has been heard to utter "There's room for both games" re: The great UT/Q3A debate. But will this be the case? Is there room for both in ClanUK? One would like to think so although both games play very differently (ok, ok, there are only so many ways to frag a lamer but it's all about weapon handling, ask any trained assassin) and seem to be attracting different crowds, I'm an unchanging Quake veteran myself, but I seem to be in the minority here so no doubt I'll have both games in my collection. Although one cannot deny the appeal of playing as ClanUK in Quake Arena and mixing the letters to form QUACK as our clan tag. You know you want it.
Surviving the Wait for D2
Having finally got my copy of Baldur's Gate working on my beast of a new PC I'm set for a while, but how are people coping with the long wait before the release of what could be the biggest anti-climax since sliced bread (which, you must admit, was hardly revolutionary)? Of course, D2 could be _the_ game of 2000/2001/2002/whenever, just make sure you sign up for the Beta test. Anyway, here's my guide to surviving the bitter days/weeks/months:
1. Write a long-winded & dull news column no-one is going to read. Give it
up after one addition after claiming it's gunna be weekly.
2. Spend every waking moment checking www.battle.net & www.blizzard.com for new
information, collect your drool in plastic containers & sell it to insecure people
as a slimming drink.
3. Repeatedly e-mail Blizzard complaining, putting more of their staff on PR &
slowing release down further.
4. Buy Live "The Distance to Here" and rejoice.
5. Hang around your local HMV/Electronics Boutique & ask repeatedly about release
dates for Diablo2.. maybe throw in the occasional Team Fortess 2 comment. Camp
on their doorstep, don't shave.
6. Start playing UO or EQ, drop greys in the former & kite in the latter, become
so absorbed in macroing, cooking 5000 fish & waiting for server updates that when
Diablo2 comes out you don't notice.
7. Read all the jokes posted on ClanChat. When you've finished, buy Diablo 2,
3 & get a copy of Warcraft 3 while you're at it.
8. Buy system shock 2, neglect sleep for a couple of weeks, lose all track of
time & become amazed when Diablo2 comes out "just a few days later"
9. Write a list of things to do while waiting for something, pretend to be original
and witty by adding "write a list of things to do while waiting for x" as one
of the listed options, realise it has all been done before & drown in self pity.
Diablo 2 becomes meaningless.
Settlers 3 Is not a myth.
Nor is the strategy zone, no matter how little seems to have gone on within its walls in the past. Indeed, a window, or 7, has been opened & light is shining into the land of strategy once more. Th|= Caster has taken up Strategy Zonemastery and has already started showing off his talents with some mad flash skills. If you have the time, visit the Strategy zone & drool. A sign of exciting things to come? One hopes so.
Clan Chat Constantly Criticised.
It seems no matter what goes on within the bulging bag of fun, known to us all as Clan Chat, someone's not going to be happy with it. Flames, Old Jokes, insane banter, computer game talk, quizzes, picture-fests, whatever, they're all a product of the greatness that is ClanUK. The forums house a bunch of people of all shapes and sizes and so produce things of all shapes and sizes (I'm not suggesting there is any mating going on). Just take a step back for a second & think, "Isn't that cool?" Yes? No? Whatever your view, take care of yourselves, and each other.
Your fully higher-order, purely functional +=30ft-Smurf=+ with a nonstrict semantics and polymorphic strong typing. Comments? Criticism? Death Threats? friedsmurf@hotmail.com ta.
Action Zone Restructure
We've joined a TFC league for which we unfortunately have to miss the first match of :o(
The rundown on the league is:
"The Stronghold is a brand new Team Fortress Classic League open to all clans who display an attitude of sportsmanship and are prepared to turn up for at least one games a week, fielding 5 or more troopers per team. The idea is to provide a vessel for the dedicated UK clans to have an arena in which to regularly test their skills against like minded individuals. The league is currently full and about to begin Season 1."
ClanUK's fixtures currently look like:
04/10/1999 Satan's Little Helpers - [SLH]
11/10/1999 Clan ? - [-?-]
18/10/1999 Clan iDentity - [iD]
25/10/1999 W.A.S.T.E.D - [WASTED]
01/11/1999 The Gate-Crushers - [TGC]
08/11/1999 Seek and Destroy - [SnD]
15/11/1999 Chapter - [ChPt]
22/11/1999 Extra Sensory Perception - [ESP]
29/11/1999 Classic Capture The Flag - [CCTF]
06/12/1999 Independant Operational Unit - [IOU]
13/12/1999 Armed & Insane - [A&I]
20/12/1999 Break for Christmas
27/12/1999 Y2K!!!
03/01/2000 Clan Anomoly - [~A~]
10/01/2000 Veni Vidi Vici - [VVV]
17/01/2000 Clan Nipple Clamp - [CNC]
24/01/2000 Pilgrim - [PGM]
And here's a link
to the table.
New Strategy Zonemaster
We have a new ZoneMaster for the 'Strategy Zone'.
Please put your hands together for The Caster!
Yes, TC has kindly agreed to take command of the Strategy web sites, so please email him direct at ben@tress.f9.co.uk if you play ANY strategy games. He'll be pulling together information and web pages for the games that people actually play, so if you don't let him know . . . you won't get your fave games represented. Don't delay, contact TC today!
Hammy [Webmaster]
Op's Elections Results are in!
Check out the Election Zone.
Hammy [Webmaster]
Minutes of Trial to Full meeting of Saturday 18/9/99
Members attending:
Merly
Kitten
Ypnos
Cerberus
Mithrander
Eqqus
Medman
Polecat
Taz
Kiwi
Defty
Aydindril
AcidReign
Cuthrose
Adder
Snoogle
Candidates & Result
Tron-Yes
Borax-Yes
Flash-Yes
Pony/Eqqus- Yes
Gromit- no decision reached
Alatar- Yes
Grey Beard- no decision reached
Polecat- yes
Ganalorn-no decision reached
Mordeb- Yes
Zilfin-Yes
Aargh- no decision reached
Kaerwek- Yes
That's about it . Those who didn't have decisions reached was because no one new them.
May I just take this opportunity to suggest that we re- think our method of voting in full members? Obviously, not many people show up at the meeting. I think we should have a secure board for full members only to use - where the trial members names would be posted - and the membership could post yes/no/don't know votes over a period of time . . .
Kitten [Emergency Committee Secretary]
Forum Configuration Changes
Two configuration changes will be carried out the the ClanUK Forums this evening (13/09/99).
The first is straighforward: -
An 'Acceptable Use Policy' has been approved by the Arbiter and the Ops. In using
the ClanUK Forums, you agree to be bound by this policy.
The second item has also been approved by the Arbiter and the Ops, and is as follows: -
A Forum account will be 'required' before any person can post there, although non-account holders would still be able to read the public areas. Anyone can apply for an account online, by clicking on the 'Edit Profile' option on the menu and following the on-screen instructions. Accounts are no longer granted automatically in real time, they are queued pending review by a moderator. If the account was then granted by a Moderator, a ClanUK member would be given a ClanUK account whilst a non-member would be given a non-ClanUK account. Permission on the 'secure' areas would remain as they are now.
The advantages to this system are as follows: -
We would know who everyone is - no anonymous posts, no pseudonyms etc ;
Should anyone contravene the 'Acceptable Use Policy', their account can be disabled
immediately. They would be unable to post anything, pending further investigation
and/or re-instatement of their account
Hammy [Webmaster]
Donations Update
I know that you've all been dying to know what the figures are - and here they are as of Sunday 27 of June.
Number of members who have pledged:67
Amount pledged:£1615
Number of members who have donated:36
Amount donated:£1103.07
What does this mean? Well- first of all- we can go ahead and buy out Jed. I must encourage you, however, to continue to send in your donations because- if we get in all of this money that was pledged- we will be able to finance hosting the site for an additional year. This will give us plenty of time to find alternative funding, or hosting options, or to recover from this bout of donating to do it again. Continuing thanks to all who have been supporting this.
Kitten [Emergency Committee Secretary]
Complaints Procedure
A discussion document - for the attention of everyone really!
Membership Procedures
As part of the review of ClanUK membership procedures, Smurf has prepared a document for the attention of ZoneMasters and GameAuthors. Please read ASAP!!
Members input wanted
Ops have already been asked to look at membership procedures, and are looking to consult with members on this. A discussion document is available or get in touch with Ops to let them know your views.
The other biggie Ops are looking into is communication within ClanUK. Again a suggestion document is available or get in touch with Ops to let them hear your ideas on how to improve communication.
Members have already offered some helpful suggestions on these two issues, but Ops are inviting more opinions and welcoming more views so get in touch if you want your opinion to be heard :)
Copyright © ClanUK 1996-1998